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Luke Edwards is Chief Sports Writer of The Journal and uses his blog to give a unique and entertaining insight into events at Newcastle United and Sunderland.

As well as football, Luke also regularly takes a wry look at the biggest sports stories from across the North-East and beyond. From cricket to rugby and basketball to boxing, some are criticised and some are praised.

Sometimes provocative, sometimes laugh-aloud funny, but always interesting Luke Who's Talking also gives you the chance to interact with Luke and have your say on all the major sporting issues.

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November 2006 Archives


There Was Money But It Wasn't Spent Properly

Posted by Luke on November 1, 2006 12:02 PM

Glenn Roeder has claimed he is surprised his Newcastle United side have not managed to transfer their cup form into the league. Well I'm not and I'm sorry Glenn, but it doesn't take a genius to work out why either.

The Magpies are unbeaten in eight games in the Intertoto, Uefa and League Cups this term - winning six, drawing two and conceding only two goals in the process.

Great, well done, but with the exception of Turkey's Fenerbahce, the opposition has, roughly speaking, been about as good as Crewe Alexandra.

Sorry if there are any Crewe fans out there, somehow I doubt you'll be reading this anyway, but Norway's Lillestrom, Latvia's FK Ventspils and Estonia's FC Levadia are hardly daunting opponents are they? Newcastle teams should be beating limited teams like that just as they should always beat lower league opposition in the FA Cup.

Continue reading "There Was Money But It Wasn't Spent Properly" »

Unbelievable

Posted by Luke on November 3, 2006 11:23 AM

He was Newcastle United's star of the match so I think it is only right that we allow Tim Krul to sum up the Magpies's unexpected 1-0 win over Palermo. That's right, it was, over you to you Tim, "unbelievable."

An away victory against the joint leaders of Serie A, a wonderful defensive display, a highly efficient performance from Nicky Butt, a pinpoint cross from James Milner and, last but not least, a goal from Albert Luque. You see, I told you Glenn should give him a chance!

However, there is another point that needs addressing. It might have worked for the Newcastle Falcons, but I'm afraid Palermo have proven that pink shirts really don't have a place on the professional sports field.

But, what really caught my imagination, other than the shocking commentary from Channel Five, was Krul's post-match interview where he delivered the first recorded example of a Dutch-Geordie accent.

Continue reading "Unbelievable" »

Sack The Board

Posted by Luke on November 5, 2006 12:32 PM

When young children in the Netherlands are growing up they are told the story of the little boy who puts his finger in a hole in the dam to stop the valley flooding.

For Newcastle United that little - or not so little as it happens - Dutch boy was their 18-year-old goalkeeper Tim Krul.

Krul's heroics on his debut against Palermo in the Uefa Cup gave Glenn Roeder's side an unexpected and memorable victory against the joint leaders of Serie A.

The problem is, just like the boy with his finger in the dam, Krul's expoilts could only offer a temporary respite.

Just as the boy with his finger in the dam realised he could not plug all the gaps that were appearing and stop the valley below from flooding, neither can a backs-to-the-wall European victory fill in the gaping cracks in Newcastle's squad.

Continue reading "Sack The Board" »

Well Done Jamie Noon

Posted by Luke on November 7, 2006 11:35 AM

A lot has been said and written about England's record home defeat to New Zealand at the weekend, but precious little has been said about the performance of Newcastle Falcon centre Jamie Noon.

This time last year Noon was being ridiculed by some experts who questioned his right to a place in the side probably because they met the cousin of another centre playing for a southern club at an old school friend's wedding!

Those experts should be wiping the egg off their face this week after the former target of their mockery proved to be one of the only players who could live with the mighty All Blacks on Sunday.

Continue reading "Well Done Jamie Noon" »

Grevious Bodily Harmison

Posted by Luke on November 7, 2006 11:44 AM

Steve Harmison has apologised to Australian captain Ricky Ponting for the bouncer in the First Test of last summer's magnificent Ashes series which split his cheek open.

A nice gesture, but I wouldn't have bothered, just as I won't bother commenting on Freddie Shepherd's waffle yesterday about loving Geordies and his childhood spent fighting his way into school in Byker and fighting his way out again. All fantastic qualities for the boardroom of course!


No, if I was Harmy I'd have spent my time with the press suggesting that, when the Ashes start in a couple of weeks, I'd be looking to hit an even more painful area of Ponting's anatomy.

Continue reading "Grevious Bodily Harmison" »

You Must Be F-ing Joking Ref

Posted by Luke on November 10, 2006 12:31 PM

It is Day Seventeen in the Rehabilitation House and Luke is is starting to suffer from Cabin Fever, plagued by dreams of rich businessmen waving suitcases full of cash at Freddie Shepherd, Roy Keane dancing naked with a referee and Glenn Roeder running away from an axe wielding Albert Luque.

With eviction night approaching Luke is haunted by visions of rampaging All Blacks ruthlessly dismissing England's chances of defending Rugby's World Cup and of irritatingly smug Australians confidently boasting about the Ashes heading back Down Under.

I'm sorry guys and girls, but after so long sat on the sofa doing very little I'm starting to feel like a Big Brother participant, just without the television cameras, arguments, constant flirting and the promise of a bucket load of cash in prize money if I can hang on in there until the end.

Continue reading "You Must Be F-ing Joking Ref" »

Clarification

Posted by Luke on November 10, 2006 1:09 PM

I see that some people have picked up on a comment I left earlier this week and have run with it to a ridiculous extent over the last few days.

When I said I couldn't comment on the Chronicle's releationship with Newcastle United as an employee of Newcastle Chronicle and Journal it was a polite way to ask people to stop sending me comments slagging of the Chornicle and its reporters as I have got tired of constantly having to delete them.

Football is all about opinions and everyone is entitled to theirs, but please don't expect me to allow personal abuse and attacks on the Chronicle to go up here. This is not censorship, it is personal decency.

Is Football's Favourite Knight Riding To Shepherd's Rescue?

Posted by Luke on November 13, 2006 12:35 PM

It is fantastic to see Sir Bobby Robson back on his feet, limping, but smiling and talking to anyone who will listen about all things football.

After his recent stroke - suffered as he watched former club Ipswich Town play at Portman Road - the return to relative health of one of the best-loved figures in English football will have raised the spirits of everyone who remembers what he did for the national side, as well as Newcastle United.

But none will have been more pleasantly surprised than Freddie Shepherd to see his former manager back on the beat because Robson has stunned most observers by appearing to back the embattled Newcastle supremo who sacked him just four games and two defeats into the 2004/5 season after three successive top five finishes in the Premiership.

Continue reading "Is Football's Favourite Knight Riding To Shepherd's Rescue?" »

Mind Games

Posted by Luke on November 14, 2006 1:07 PM

I returned to work today after three weeks of post-surgery rest and rehabilitation. Marcus Trescothick left work today after four days of cricket and a measly ten runs on England’s Ashes Tour.

The Somerset opener has suffered a reoccurrence of the “stress-related” illness which kept him out of the ICC Champions Trophy in India and, do you know what, I think it is probably for the best.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not hammering the guy for struggling with stress - although it has to be said there are more stressful jobs to do than playing cricket - because stress can do horrible and strange things to people.

It’s just that an intense Ashes Tour where the Australians are foaming at the mouth to reclaim the famous little Urn is not the place for a fragile and unstable mind.

The Australia captain Ricky Ponting suggested last week that there were lines you did not cross in sport and that nobody in a baggy green cap would be targeting Trescothick’s mental health. Yeah right, Ricky. That’s a bit like saying to a boxer “I know you have a suspect chin, but I’m not going to smack it really hard, honest.”

Continue reading "Mind Games" »

Keane Doesn't Have The Midas Touch

Posted by Luke on November 15, 2006 12:40 PM

Roy Keane’s appointment as Sunderland manager was supposed to start a revolution at the Stadium of Light. It did, unfortunately, having enjoyed early success as they stormed the barricades, the Black Cats revolution has lost momentum because somebody forgot to pack any ammunition.

The early impetus produced early rewards, but when you are firing blanks in front of goal it’s pretty hard to continue to gain ground.

It would be easy for some to start doubting whether Keane’s arrival is going to have the immense impact first predicted, but I don’t think the recent stumbles are anything to get too worried about. To the contrary, I think they will benefit the club and Keane in the long term.

The former Manchester United captain does not have the Midas touch - but turning everything you touch into gold, while novel and extremely profitable, is not really necessary as a football manager. Far better to profit through trial and error, construction and regeneration.

Continue reading "Keane Doesn't Have The Midas Touch" »

In Dyer Need

Posted by Luke on November 16, 2006 12:03 PM

I don’t think there has been a Newcastle United player in the last decade who has divided opinion as much as Kieron Dyer. Vital playmaking cog for some, over-rated playboy for others, but here’s a thought...

Did you know that when Kieron Dyer’s contract runs out in just under three years time he will be entitled to a testimonial after ten years at St James’s Park?

Should the 27-year-old remain on Tyneside for that long there is unlikely to be the same out-pouring of hero worship seen at Alan Shearer’s farewell bash in the summer, but Dyer, for all of his injury problems, off-field scraps and apparent ability to provoke controversy in an empty room, is absolutely vital to Glenn Roeder.

Graeme Souness made plenty of mistakes as Newcastle manager and some would say giving the notoriously injury-troubled Dyer a lucrative four-year contract was one of them. But, so good were his performances, that if you ask the Scot today what cost him his job at St James’s Park he will say Dyer’s hamstrings.

Continue reading "In Dyer Need" »

Roy Keane, The Ashes And Freddie Flintoff

Posted by Luke on November 17, 2006 4:45 PM

Roy Keane is a very charming and intelligent man who has, perhaps to our surprise, been very honest and articulate in his press duties during his time at Sunderland.

But he’s not really one for what might be called small talk. With the Ashes about to start in Australia and because of a vague memory I had of seeing Keane at the Old Trafford Test match with Gary Neville last year, I thought it would be nice to have a bit of a chat about England’s chances Down Under.

I was further convinced when one of my colleagues, former Journal cricket correspondent Jason Mellor, now of the Wardle Agency, threw into the pre-press conference conversation that Keane was good friends with England and Lancashire all rounder Andrew Flintoff.

An opportunity for a bit of light-hearted banter to welcome me back on to the press circuit beckoned and, although Roy did not seem to be in the best of moods, criticising the delay in Ireland’s move from Lansdowne Road while slamming the behaviour of Ipswich Town manager Jim Magilton following the cancellation of Tommy Miller’s move to Portman Road, I pressed ahead.

Continue reading "Roy Keane, The Ashes And Freddie Flintoff" »

A Point Gained Not Proven

Posted by Luke on November 20, 2006 1:09 PM

Unexpected, unseen and, possibly unfathomable given recent performances in the Premiership, but Newcastle’s draw at Arsenal has been wholeheartedly welcomed as everything from a point proved, to a point gained to a pointer to the good times ahead for Glenn Roeder’s side.

Let me get one thing clear straight away, the draw at Arsenal was a magnificent result and proof that, after a handful of insipid displays at home, Newcastle’s players are clearly still determined to play for their manager and haul the club out of the terrible league position they have fallen into during the first third of the campaign.

It was a result achieved through grit and determination, but there was also flashes of real quality as well, from the usual suspects, Shay Given, Kieron Dyer and Scott Parker, but also from supposed misfits like Titus Bramble, Nicky Butt and, perhaps most encouragingly of all, from the £10m striker Obafemi Martins.

As regular readers of this site will know, I’m never one to say I told you so (sic), but I told you Kieron Dyer could be the difference between Championship and Premiership football next season! The midfielder has revitalised the side and, if he maintains this sort of form, I honestly don’t believe United will have anything to worry about in terms of relegation.

Continue reading "A Point Gained Not Proven" »

The Name Is Shearer, Alan Shearer

Posted by Luke on November 22, 2006 12:27 PM

He sneaked into the building undetected, sensibly dressed in the perfect night camouflage of a black top and dark jeans, carefully avoiding eye contact with anyone who might blow his cover as he spotted an empty seat and slid into it, beckoning his attractive female companion to join him.

After years of practice, such stealth came naturally, a crucial skill in a world of unwanted attention. And, then, suddenly disaster, his cover was blown, a cry went up, a finger was pointed... it’s Alan Shearer!

Shearer looked up, confused. “How could my cover have been blown?” he (possibly) asked himself, as he smiled sheepishly at the staring crowd. And then it hit him, it was all Steve Harper and his bright stripy tops fault!

Did you know that Newcastle United’s former - and greatly missed - captain is a massive James Bond fan? Nope, neither did I, but he is and, like me, decided Tuesday night, after the initial crowds had thinned, would be the perfect time to see the new movie Casino Royale.

Accompanied by his wife and close - but not very careful - friend Harper, Shearer is used to the finger pointing and staring and was utterly unfazed as he perfectly timed his entry to within a few seconds of the film starting. You see, arrive late equals arrive undetected, at least it would if Harps hadn’t blown things for him!

Continue reading "The Name Is Shearer, Alan Shearer" »

Aim For The Stumps Steve

Posted by Luke on November 23, 2006 11:22 AM

“And in comes Harmison to bowl the first ball of the Ashes 2006, he bowls and (pause) it’s gone straight to second slip, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha,” crash, bang, wallop, “oops, sorry listeners, I’ve just fallen off my chair I was laughing so hard.”

As a first ball goes, Steve Harmison’s was an absolute, unmitigated disaster and the Durham man’s next 11 overs were not much better.

In 2005, his first ball reared up off the pitch and caught Justin Langer on the hand. It set the tone for the series, the Australians were on the back foot, 18 months later and they are on the front foot, giggling and chuckling into their small glasses of Fosters!

At 346-3, Australia already look as though they have ended any vague English hopes of a victory in the First Test in Brisbane. It’s depressing and, in Great British sporting tradition, a complete anti-climax.

Continue reading "Aim For The Stumps Steve" »

A Precious Victory And A Very Bad Hair Day

Posted by Luke on November 26, 2006 3:55 PM

A thoroughly deserved Newcastle United victory was sadly overshadowed last night by one of the worst fashion faux paxs ever seen on a football field.

Now, Newcastle have known a thing or two about bad hairstyles through the years - Kevin Keegan's dodgy perm, Chris Waddle's spiky mullet and Peter Beardsley's pudding bowl cut spring readily to mind - so where better for David James to join their illustrious ranks with a chemically straightened, side parting effort which made him look like an extra from a 1920s silent movie.

Quite what was going through the former England international's mind when he swaggered into his favourite salon is unclear, although given the fact James once put his bad form at Liverpool down to spending too much time playing computer games, it's a fair bet to suggest the Portsmouth stopper is a couple of sandwiches short of a picnic if you know what I mean!

Continue reading "A Precious Victory And A Very Bad Hair Day" »

The Future's Bright?

Posted by Luke on November 27, 2006 5:04 PM

At times, supporting Newcastle United can seem like you are suffering from permanent Seasonal Adjustment Disorder - or SAD for short..

You know what I mean, all dark clouds of depression, dreary forecasts and the shivers of foreboding. Well, I think it’s only fair to suggest that, after an awful start to the season, there are some welcome rays of sunshine to brighten things up and provide a little warm feeling as we had into the Festive season.

I’ve certainly had my misgivings about this campaign, as regular readers of this blog will know. The small size of the squad, the major blunders in the summer in terms of transfers and the nagging suspicion that a few injuries would send Newcastle sliding towards relegation.

In fact, my bout of SAD started before the leaves on the trees starting turning brown and long before anyone had to clear any ice off their windscreens.

Continue reading "The Future's Bright?" »

Go Play With a Stingray Convicts!

Posted by Luke on November 28, 2006 5:32 PM

It is sometimes called verbal sparring, sometimes it is referred to as a bit of banter, but in Australia it is an art form called sledging. Australians like winning and they like beating England, but they love talking about it even more.

As far as the Australian cricket team is concerned, personal abuse and family abuse are all considered fair game when it comes to psychological warfare in sport and it seems this Ashes series is already starting to turn ugly.

During the epic Ashes series last summer, one of the defining images, like Pele swapping shirts with Bobby Moore at the 1970 World Cup, was Freddie Flintoff taking time to console a devastated Brett Lee before he celebrated England’s crucial victory at Trent Bridge.

It was great moment of sportsmanship and epitomised everything that is good about a fiercely contested, but ultimately fair-minded sporting rivalry.

That, at least, is the English view. In Australia it was seen as weakness and one of the main accusations made about Ricky Ponting’s team when they went home without the little urn was they had been too friendly with the English players.

Continue reading "Go Play With a Stingray Convicts!" »

Mind That Lorry Albert

Posted by Luke on November 29, 2006 6:01 PM

Some would say Albert Luque's Newcastle United career has been as painful to watch as a car crash, but the unfortunate Spaniard had a lucky escape from one before the Magpies Uefa Cup clash with Eintracht Frankfurt.

Not that Glenn Roeder seemed to be in the least bit bothered by the news that Graeme Souness' £9.5m signing from Deportivo La Coruna had just had a near-death experience! In fact, had the unwanted forward been in the car, instead of outside making a phone call, he might have been in serious trouble.

"He's an experienced person and I don't think he will allow something like this is unsettle him," said United's manager in his pre-match press conference. "He's fine and he'll play against Frankfurt."

Oh okay, that's alright then. A lorry smashes into the back of his car, which, if he had been in it, could have led to a serious injury, but he's fine, not a scratch. Moving on.

I hear Luque is almost certainly on his way in January, with both Villareal and Real Betis wanting to take him back to La Liga. Although no news from Barcelona, mind you the thought of the reigning European Champions wanting him after such a disastrous spell in England did seem a little far-fetched!

Continue reading "Mind That Lorry Albert" »