June 2007 Archives

Far be it for me to tell Sam Allardyce how to do his job, but if Arsenal offer £13m for Obafemi Martins I'd not only take the cheque off them, I'd throw in a complimentary mug and offer to pay the Nigerian's First Class train fare to London.

It’s not that Martins is a bad player, far from it. For a first season in English football, a return of 17 goals is a fantastic achievement - Darren Bent scored 13 last season and has just signed for Tottenham for £16m - and I don’t think it is beyond the realms of fantasy to suggest that, without his goals, Newcastle could have been relegated.

But I have, as regular readers will know, two doubts about him. His attitude and application and his ability to play effectively alongside Michael Owen.

As I was trudging through the mud and rain while swigging a luke warm cup of pear cider at the Glastonbury Festival over the weekend it occurred to me that I hadn’t thought about sport since I arrived on Thursday afternoon.

The sun had been shining then, a luxury we Glastonbury-goers soon had to live without, but as the rain began trickle through my waterproof - or not so as the case maybe - Leyton Orient jacket, I suddenly found my mind wandering away from the Lilly Allen performance I was making slow progress towards while trying not to lose my Dunlop wellies in the mud.

So Mike Ashley is close to completing his takeover of Newcastle United and a new era at St James's Park is dawning or breaking, whatever.

Here comes the financial bit - Ashley has, through his company St.James' Holdings, acquired just over 77% of the club's shares. That now provides Ashley with the platform to buy all the shares and de-list the company from the Stock Exchange, with a date of July 18 circulating around the City.

Good job, I've never believed football and the City belong together and neither, it seems, do the billionaires buying their way into the game to take clubs back into private ownership.

We don't know much about Ashley, other than he is a hugely successful businessman with a history in sport manufacturing and retail. It would be nice if we knew a bit more and, once the takeover is complete, hopefully he will use the local media to communicate his ideas to the club's fans.

So are you excited about the start of the new season now that the fixture list has been released? Have you already written the games in your diary, using a special bright pen to highlight the big games?

Well that was stupid wasn't it because the fixture list - which incidentally costs every newspaper £1,000 to print - released on Thursday morning will be virtually useless before a ball has been kicked.

It has been a long time since either Newcastle or Sunderland brought some silverware back to the North-East, but they could be celebrating one together this summer if Durham triumph in the Friends Provident Trophy.

Not since Jim Montgomery defied the laws of physics with that wonderful double save against Leeds in the 1973 FA Cup Final and Bob Stokoe danced - a bit like your drunken grandad - across the Wembley pitch have the Black Cats lifted a trophy.

And not since a man landed on the moon - although conspiracy theories suggest the only place Neil Armstrong and that other chap nobody remembers landed was a warehouse in the middle of the Nevada desert - and Bob Moncur lifted the Fairs Cup in 1969 have Newcastle seen the black and white stripes tied around a big shiny pot.

Look, I’m not going to say it again, the Intertoto Cup does not count as a trophy......

I wonder if Joey Barton celebrated his signing for Newcastle United by smoking a big fat Cuban cigar. Although, I'm sure if he did, he disposed of it sensibly and didn't stub it out on anyone's face!

Given Barton's colourful history of off-field misdemeanours, Sam Allardyce has shown a certain amount of bravery in making him his first signing as Newcastle manager, but talking to United's new boss on Wednesday, there is no doubt in his mind that the player's quality on the pitch is all that matters.

Whether that is a view shared by the former Manchester City player he burnt with a cigar at the club's Christmas party a few years back is unlikely and certainly there are those who cannot look beyond Barton's bad boy reputation once he is left to his own devices away from football.

It might be early days as they say - quite who they are I don't know but anyway - and Sunderland's promotion to the Premiership has already turned into a bit of an anti-climax hasn't it?

No I’m not talking about record lowest points scores, weekly humiliations on Match of the Day or 3-0 home defeats at the hands of Fulham and Wigan, I’m talking about the lack of transfer activity.

Of course, there has been plenty of speculation about who will be arriving on Wearside this summer, most of it involving Roy Keane’s former teammates at Manchester United or anyone with a drop of Irish blood in their heritage, but still nothing certain.

So Titus Bramble's sufferance for not having his contract renewed at Newcastle is a £40,000-a-week deal at Wigan Athletic and Scott Parker's failure to get on with sections of the club's supporters will lead to an even more lucrative move to West Ham. Life goes on eh lads!

While we have known about Bramble's departure for a while, the imminent sale of Parker is a more shocking development and I, for one, will be sorry to see him leave.

No, it doesn't have anything to do with the fact we're both from London and could share stories over a plate of warm lager and jellied eels while listening to Chas and Dave CDs, it's more to do with the fact that I thought Scottie was a good player and a good person to boot.