There are some things that should only be done on holiday like karaoke, bingo and getting ridiculously competitive about a game of water polo or pistol shooting against beer bellied, out of shape fellow holiday makers. And then there are things which shouldn't be done on holiday but are, like going down to the pub to watch football on the telly.
You will be pleased/mildly interested/ couldn't care less just get on with talking about the football/ to know that I've managed to do all of the above with the exception of the karaoke during my week in Majorca. One drunken and hideously out of tune rendition of Michael Jackson's Billie Jean earlier this year fills my quota of sing-a-long embarrassments I feel.
Anyway, to the football. I've never been on holiday with so many people from the North-East before - Newcastle and Sunderland fans all living in harmony around the pool (who'd have thought it) and when one United fan - Graham - went for a stroll around the resort of Alcudia he was delighted to inform us there was a Toon Bar to watch the Magpies play Middlesbrough in.
I've always wondered about the existence of Toon Bars. Given that, for me, Geordies are like the English Irish (interesting phrase don't you think!?) - distinctive accent, move all over the place and fiercely proud of their roots and regional identity - I've always been surprised not to see more of them.
The Canny Lad was everything you would expect from a Toon Bar. It was a bar, it served drinks, Walkers crisps and had lots of Newcastle pictures and memorabilia pinned to every available space on the wall and on the bar. Pride of place went to Alan Shearer, of course, but there was even a signed picture of Jermaine Jenas on display!
On match day - like any bar in the city would be - it was also full of people in Newcastle shirts eating Sunday lunches, chips and gravy and full English breakfasts - only sweating a bit more than they would in Rosie's! What better way to watch Newcastle play abroad?
For once I got to do what most fans do on a match day - drink. It's kinda frowned upon in the press box - and from what I can remember through a haze of cider - I was called a southern softie for drinking that by owner Les - Newcastle were pretty poor in a pretty poor match!
They did, however, score two excellent goals. Charles N'Zogbia's strike was superb and further evidence that Sam Allardyce is capable of extracting the best out of difficult players. Mark Viduka's first goal for United was also pretty special, great strength and skill to hold off Jonathan Woodgate and then a powerful finish into the bottom corner.
Sadly, while Sam has changed much, there were some familiar failings at the Riverside. Twice Newcastle took the lead, twice they threw it away, the second in particular coming from some slack defending which allowed Julio Arca to pick his spot from the edge of the area.
With ten minutes left, Newcastle should have been able to see the game out, but they didn't because they switched off and failed to do that most crucial of things when protecting a narrow lead - KEEP the ball! A basic failing that needs common sense rather than fancy training techniques to solve.
Newcastle created little in the game from open play, with Alan Smith and Geremi anonymous, although watching a game on television can sometimes be unkind to a player's contribution off the ball, while Obafemi Martins clearly struggled in a three-pronged strikeforce.
But still they should have won, which says a lot about Boro's problems this season. Ultimately, of course, it's another away game without a defeat and a home win against Wigan will mean it has been an encouraging start to the season under Allardyce so when I return with my suntan there will still be plenty of reason to be optimistic. I mean, come on, the Carling Cup campaign hasn't even started yet!
Finally, special mention to the Newcastle fans who made the afternoon such a drunken one. Simon "spanner" O'Toole, Graham "it's only ten minutes round the corner" Crawford, Jimmy "Long Legs", his son Alex "sexy time" and my girlfriend Kirsty "what's the score" Pedersen.
Like all good holidays, I'll be putting some pics of the bar up on this page when I get home on Wednesday.
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