October 2007 Archives

Surely if Glenn Roeder can get another management job in football, Sam Allardyce can decide to change his football philosophy away from home.

Thanks to the readers of this column, I’ve been informed of some rather alarming comments made by Newcastle’s manager on Sky Sport’s Goals on Sunday programme last weekend. One of the first rules of journalism is to check something and then double check it, but I’m willing to take your word on this one.

Sam, apparently, was on the show alongside best pal and former Sunderland manager Peter Reid and, when asked what he could do to improve Newcastle’s away form, suggested sacrificing a striker for a five-man midfield. What!?

I have to admit, I was one of the lucky ones. I didn’t have to travel to Reading to watch Newcastle United serve up yet another sickening away performance. Then again, when you consider the fact I was at the Stadium of Light to watch Sunderland struggling against Fulham, maybe I wasn’t so lucky after all!

At least I didn’t have the 12-hour round trip to deal with and I suspect anyone who did travel to Reading will feel as though Sam Allardyce has ruined whatever goodwill he had built up in recent weeks.

For me, there is nothing worse than watching a side being easily beaten which has been set-up with the sole intention of being hard to beat. That, though, is what Newcastle became at the weekend - dull, unambitious and unimaginative. To borrow a phrase from some American teen drama or other, that sucks!

I have to admit, I was one of the lucky ones. I didn’t have to travel to Reading to watch Newcastle United serve up yet another sickening away performance. Then again, when you consider the fact I was at the Stadium of Light to watch Sunderland struggling against Fulham, maybe I wasn’t so lucky after all!

At least I didn’t have the 12-hour round trip to deal with and I suspect anyone who did travel to Reading will feel as though Sam Allardyce has ruined whatever goodwill he had built up in recent weeks.

For me, there is nothing worse than watching a side being easily beaten which has been set-up with the sole intention of being hard to beat. That, though, is what Newcastle became at the weekend - dull, unambitious and unimaginative. To borrow a phrase from some American teen drama or other, that sucks!

It’s not much fun being Fulham is it. I mean, how would you feel if every team promoted to the Premier League spent the season declaring they had to beat you?

It’s strange that a team apparently as harmless and inoffensive as Fulham should be treated in such a harsh manner by their rivals. If you despised Chelsea, fine, but there really isn’t much to dislike about the Cottagers is there?

They are owned by some Egyptian guy who also owns Harrod’s and is convinced the British government killed Princess Diana and his son Dodi in one of the most enduring conspiracy theories since some guy called Oswald popped JFK from some grassy knoll in Dallas, but that isn’t a reason to hate them is it?

If Jermaine Jenas was relishing the chance to return his former club with Tottenham I’d hate to see how he played when he wasn’t looking forward to it.

The poor guy (or should that be goldfish) had an absolute shocker, despite his bold boast about thriving on the animosity aimed at him at St James’s Park. By my count, he passed the ball straight out of play three times, failed to have a single meaningful shot and was responsible for United’s third goal as he failed to close down James Milner.

Roy Keane said he wants points not plaudits after the defeat at West Ham at the weekend so I’ve got a point to make with no plaudits. Shouldn’t Sunderland be a little braver away from home against teams like the Hammers?

The Black Cats certainly held their own at Upton Park and, had it not been for a wonderful instinctive save from Robert Green to deny Grant Leadbitter after Kenwyne Jones had headed in an equaliser, they might have taken something back to Wearside with them.

Instead, they left east London with no points for the third game in a row - it was also their 20th in London without a win - and have failed to win a single game away from the Stadium of Light so far this season. Things are certainly better than they were under Mick McCarthy, but Keane’s right, they need to start taking points, not collecting hard luck stories.

For those of you old enough to remember - I never thought I’d use that phrase - there was a song sung by the Spitting Image puppets called “I’ve Never Met A Nice South African....� and never has a truer word been said by the satirical puppeteers!

Of course, that dates back to a time of apartheid when black people couldn’t vote in the country and Nelson Mandela was still locked up in a prison cell. Things have moved on a lot since then, but I still reckon the England players should play it in the dressing room before the game to get themselves in the mood for the fight.

Do you ever get those sinking feelings, when your guts feel like they have been turned upside down and shaken around like a cat in a tumble dryer? Well I had one the moment Steven Gerrard somehow managed to steer his shot wide from just six yards against Russia.

There was just something about the miss, the fact it was so easy, the fact he was unmarked and, nine times out of ten would have smashed it past the stranded goalkeeper without any fuss at all, that made me think, “this is all about to go horribly wrong.�

A nice dive, a poor-sighted referee and a fumbling idiot of a goalkeeper later and things had, indeed, all gone a little pear-shaped for Steve McClaren and his players.

Did you know that plastic is perhaps the greatest invention known to man, but quite why England have to play football on it against Russia is beyond me.

However, if England’s players think they have got it bad on the astro-turf in Moscow, spare a thought for Sunderland midfielder Dickson Etuhu whose first call-up to the Nigeria squad has been soured, ever so slightly, by the fact he was robbed in Mexico.

We are used to being disappointed when it comes to our national teams as they lurch from one cringe worthy humiliation to the next, but for once, what a weekend to be an Englishman!

A thrashing for the (erm) mighty Estonia at Wembley in the football and a World Cup semi-final win over France in the rugby courtesy of that guy Jonny Wilkinson’s boot. Swing Low, Sweet Chariot and so on and so on..... Don’t you just love jumping on a bandwagon?

As someone whose experience of playing rugby at school amounted to one competitive game, when I stood shivering on the wing with my sleeves pulled over my hands for protection from the icy wind, I wouldn’t say I was a rugby expert as such!