Well the good news is that I’ve survived my stag do with all of my body hair intact and I didn’t have to spend a single second tied to lamp post naked. The bad news is that I’ve returned to work to find the transfer market remains as sluggish as ever.
Hopefully that is all going to change when Kevin Keegan and Roy Keane are back behind their desks next week and the European Championships draw to a close.
Talking of the Euros, my one man boycott continues. I’ve still not watched a single game and don’t intend to either.
I’ve been kept up-to-date with what’s happening by friends and colleagues, who insist I’ve missed out on a treat as a result of my stubbornness. But I can be pig headed sometimes and I refuse to alter my stance that, without England, the Euros are about as rewarding as trying to sell your house during a credit crunch!
There is always that nagging sensation I’m missing out, but I can deal with it. As far as I can tell from Sky Sports news, the only real topic for discussion is whether Cristiano Ronaldo is going to sign for Real Madrid or stay at Manchester United, a saga which seems to be on a constant 24 hour loop.
I thoroughly enjoyed seeing their news reporter being abused by Portuguese security officials on Tuesday, as he was unceremoniously shoved out of the way with a cry of “do you not understand English.�
He was then seen smiling to the viewers back home as he happily held aloft the lollipop Ronaldo had been sucking during the press conference where he had managed to find out absolutely nothing! Priceless television if you ask me and typical of Sky to claim they have something different to everyone else, even when that something different amounts to a lollipop!
What next? Michael Ballack’s toe clippings? Andrea Pirlo's sweaty jock strap? Or perhaps they could break into the Dutch team hotel and ask Ruud van Nistelrooy if they can have the bag he puts his horse feed in!
As for potential signings, I’ve been told Newcastle transfer target Bafetimbi Gomis has looked distinctly average, while Turkish winger Arda Turan has looked like a star in the making, which presumably means he won’t be heading to Tyneside as he will have the pick of European’s biggest clubs once his involvement in the tournament comes to an end.
As for Sunderland, don’t be surprised if they do not sign anyone on the basis of their international performances as Keane is more concerned with getting players who have previous Premier League experience and who can blame him? After all, this is a manager who spent £2.5m on Rade Prica in January, a Swedish striker who has yet to start a game for the Black Cats!
So what have I been doing instead? Well cricket is the new football, what with the so-called Twenty20 revolution and Kevin Pietersen’s switch hitting at the Riverside last weekend.
Except, as much as I love the game, it isn’t the new football is it? Okay, so it’s more newsworthy than ever and the money on offer in Twenty20 cricket is very exciting for the players and counties, but it’s never going to have the same following or intense interest as football in this country, or globally.
It’s also interesting to note that, while Durham have had an excellent start to this year’s competition and are - I’m writing this before Wednesday night’s home game against Nottinghamshire - second in the North division, they are still only getting crowds of around 5,000. In other words, although this is a large crowd for them, it’s still only roughly equivalent to what League Two side Darlington get for their home games.
It’s also interesting to see that, despite the increased coverage and the hype which greeted the introduction of the Indian Premier League, crowds have not increased this season across the country and, in some cases, are even down on last year. Have we over-estimated the new form of the game’s popularity and what knock on effects will this have?
As for Pietersen deciding that he can bat as well left-handed as he can right-handed, good on him.
There have been complaints from some former bowlers that this is unfair, but I bet they won’t be complaining when he tries it again, misses the ball and his middle stump goes flying. It is a brave and hugely entertaining shot, but it isn’t exactly going to become the mainstay of any batsman’s armoury because of the high risks involved.
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